The Serve

Someone put it in your pocket? Of course they did

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a new one.

Just when you thought ‘It was my mother’s diuretic’ and ‘I got it from the toilet seat’ had exhausted the list of possible excuses for having an involvement with drugs, Andrew Johns expands the lexicon.

Someone put it in my pocket.This is a tough thing for Johns. Since retiring from league, he has become Andrew Johns, private citizen. He no longer has to answer to the Newcastle Knights, the NRL, or the public. Family, friends and employers are a different story, but that’s not going to stop this from saturating every bit of media for the next fortnight.He will be forever stained. However, as ludicrous as it sounds, if he chooses to life the lifestyle that has got him into this mess, that’s his business.

The public statement though is as different story.

Team Johns hastily put out a few paragraphs. His management is known for being extremely smart. Savvy.

Not today.

What was served up this morning was silly. Johns was caught red-handed, but according to Team Joey, it wasn’t his fault.

To blame someone else, even when the truth is clear, is a typical reaction from an Australian athlete in trouble.

It’s tired.

Firstly, the very notion of someone putting a tablet in his pocket, without his knowledge, is reprehensible. He knew exactly what it was and he had no problem accepting it.

It’s not as if people are putting tic-tacs in each others pockets as a subtle reminder of bad breath.

Nowhere did the statement refer to the evils of drugs, his predilection for dabbling.

Instead we hear about the ills of someone else.

At least we didn’t get ‘this is the first time I’ve done this’.

Fellow Fordham man John Laws was quick to defend his stable mate, reading out curious, if not dubious, e-mails suggesting Johns did nothing wrong and was just plain unlucky.

The pandering was excremental.

The revelations only surfaced a few hours ago, but this columnist will guarantee you this. In tomorrow’s papers, there will be an ex-player calling for Johns’ exclusion from ‘Immortal’ status. I’d put my house on it. If I had one.

Heck, we might even have the nine year old girl with the purple texta making another appearance.

She is a Knights fan after all.

Whatever has transpired in England should in no way tarnish his on field achievements. He is still a legend.

The public knows he’s a knockabout. They knew he punted and drunk and generally had a good time. Sure, this is a new level of misbehavior, but the fans won’t care.

What Johns’ fans will care about is the deception. The shifting of blame. The lack of responsibility.

People are drawn to a comeback story. Team Johns could have started the road to recovery what that statement. They could have talked about Johns’ commitment to inform the public of the evils of ecstasy. To steer his young fans away from such temptations.

Shamed Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick is already picking up a new fan base in America, simply for saying ‘sorry’ for brutality killing scores of dogs. If people can forgive that, a pill in the pocket ain’t insurmountable.

Oh, but that’s right, it wasn’t his fault.

Andrew Johns has stuffed up twice.